I’ve loved.

I’ve lost.

They say,

“It’s better

To have loved

And lost,

Than never to have

Loved at all.."

But I know

That loving

With the strength

Of the heart

Of Christ

Tends to be lost

On those

Who can’t

Understand

What that’s worth..

So

I share the 

Sentiments

Of Paul.

Philippians 1

Verses 23

Through 24

Since

I’m not here

To be loved;

He told me

What my life was

For.

It’s so

Hard

To find

Joy

Knowing that I am

Cursed

So I

Pray

Incessantly

That worldly

Evil

Will be

Reversed;

At first,

I wanted

Revenge..

For my pain to be

Disbursed

Among those

Who have caused it

That they could feel

My

Worst

Pain

And suffering;

Reimbursed

Tossed

Headfirst

Into an ocean

Of my tears;

Immersed..

But what

Would be

The point?

Last thing

I’m here

To do

Is

Disappoint

The One who

Sent me..

He

Meant me

For

Better things.

So

Though I

Lament

Over the

Constant

Torment

That humans

Cause;

He restores

My heart's

Commitment

By reassuring me

With

The

Contentment

Of knowing

That His

Love

Always

Wins

Over

Discontentment.

My

Resentment

Disappears

Dead fears

And

Dried tears

Replace

The need for

Vengeance;

Encouraging

Repentance

And

Dependence

On His

Mercy

To isolate me

From the

Hurt

Me..

Because,

You see..

Unlike you,

He will never

Desert me..

Never to

Have loved

At all..

That’s what

You did.

You hid.

You dipped

Out on me

Skipped

Out on me

While I

Waited

Patiently

For

Nothing.

Should have

Known

You were

Bluffing.

Real love

Is

Evident

Through

Action..

Will any

Human

Ever truly

Love me?

Maybe I’ll

Never have

That

Satisfaction.

While you

Were hiding

I was

Fighting

To be

Found..

If Yah

Decides

To change my

Fate..

It

Won’t

Ever be

Too soon;

Nor too

Late.

I’ll

Be

Around.